Getting Your Relationship Back After Infidelity

Infidelity is one malady that ails a lot of relationships in today’s world. It’s sad, but it’s true. We live in a highly fast-paced society, and the rationale behind what a lot of people do can be astonishing at times. Whether due to lust or just a desire to “taste something new”, a lot of people have fallen into the trap of infidelity, and it has ended up costing them their relationships.

So here’s the issue; what do you do when you find yourself in a relationship where you catch your partner being unfaithful?

Look through below the following tips might come in handy for you (or ta the very least, someone you know)

Don’t act rashly

A lot of people believe in the whole justification theory.

This is wrong.

The fact that your partner cheated doesn’t give you a pass to do whatever you want and act rationally. You need to exercise maturity and understand that the situation of your relationship is very finicky. Anything done out of misplaced feelings could hurt the relationship and bring it to an abrupt end.

Get your feelings straight

When you find out that your partner has cheated, you begin to eel a cascade of feelings at the same time. It’s totally understandable. However, if you’re trying to fix things up, it is essential to understand whether you really are interested in fixing that relationship. Ask yourself if you will like for the relationship to be saved or if you’re better off just ending things.

Give your feelings expression

Now that you’ve decided on what you want to do, it is also important that you air your feelings. Feelings that have been suppressed always have a way of finding their way to the surface, and the ensuing action is not usually palatable. To wit, make sure that you let your partner know what it is that hurt you and what they will have to do in order to start on the way back to winning your trust. Regardless of whether your partner thinks you should feel sad or hurt, make it clear that your feelings are valid and legitimate.

However, also remember that the expression of your feelings is no license to be violent. Express those feelings with words, and not actions. If the conversation gets heated and you feel agitated then the best action might be to leave before everything escalates and there’s no going back.

Listen as well

Still on the issue of feelings, you need to understand that a relationship is a two-way street. While you’ll get the chance to express your feelings, you should listen to those of your partner as well. Your partner needs to be a contributor to the progress of this damaged relationship, and any form of unwillingness might signal that they feel the relationship has run its course. Listen to the needs of your partner and evaluate whether you will also be able to provide these needs. You need to understand that regardless of what they’ve done, your partner’s feelings are still relevant in the relationship.

Envisage the perfect relationship

Everyone has that perfect relationship in their head.

Now that you know what caused the whole infidelity bout, then you can work towards finding happiness and trusting each other once more.

Break off contact with the “side”

Now that you and your partner seem committed to actually giving the relationship another go, it is important that the partner cuts off contact with the “other person”. Reminders stir up feelings, and you need to do your best not to put your partner in that situation again.

  • Its hard to fix anything when the spouse continues to mislead you and give you false hope, but you are right if you both wanted to work all facts need to be put on the table and go from there, this is the only way you will get the trust back

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